a_silver_story | Torchwood IMs: Ianto and Jack's e-mails (Reply)

Title: Ianto and Jack's e-mails.
Chapter: 75
Characters: Ianto Jones, Jack Harkness
Author:

a_silver_story
Genre Humour, smut
Rating: NC-17
Warnings: M.M implied
Disclaimer: If I owned anything in this, I'd be a rich rich rich bitch. However, I am not a rich rich rich bitch so you may all, therefore, assume I own nothing. Which I don't. It all belongs ~~RTD~~ and the BBC, in case any of you didn't know.
Summary: GAwwwwwd I can't think of one. I dunno ... they all die?

FIRST PART | Ianto and Gwen's IM's

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75 |

To: Jack Harkness
From: Ianto Jones
Subject: Great, great misfortunes fall upon us in our hour of ... basically, I’m blowing you off, and not in the way you like.
Message:

Jack,

I know I promised to come down to your office after gossiping with Gwenniekins, but I’ve got a little sidetracked sorting out the ante-room in the Tourist Office. I am, however, willing to pause every now and then to confirm any details you may wish to plan on your own in the mean time [via email, as you have rather cruelly decided to disable IM. If it’s not back online soon, you’re on a sex ban].

Ianto

To: Ianto Jones
From: Jack Harkness
Subject: RE: Your bollocking long e-mail subject.
Message:

Ianto,

You did this on purpose, but since you’re willing to sort of meet me ‘halfway’, I won’t make you suffer for it, just yet (I know, I know: promises, promises ...). And I seriously doubt you’d be able to uphold a sex ban, and the IM-free hub is only until you and Gwen actually start to get some work done! I know I’ve become addicted to the cute little bleepy-talky program, so cold turkey for all of us is the only thing that will work!

I was thinking that later we should go down to the den. Maybe try a little ... shibari? Maybe even make use of the d-rings in the ceiling?

Jack

To: Jack Harkness
From: Ianto Jones
Subject: RE: It’s not my fault my vocabulary is too wide to substitute with short subject lines!
Message:

Dare I ask what shibari is? ... will it need a “Not Safe for Work” warning?

And I didn’t do this on purpose! – though you may punish me as you see fit. Once IM is back, of course ...

Ianto

To: Ianto Jones
From: Jack Harkness
Subject: RE: Ianto likes 8====D
Message:

Shibari is Japanese bondage. When used more personally, it’s practically an art form once you take the time to tie all the decorative knots and weaves.

To: Jack Harkness
From: Ianto Jones
Subject: RE: Jack likes 8=======D
Message:

I just Googled it. Seems ... exotic. Nothing overly different to what we’ve done before, it just seems to involve a distinct lack of floor.

I’m not overly sure that’s what I want just yet. Will it hurt, and will it leave marks?

Ianto

To: Ianto Jones
From: Jack Harkness
Subject: RE: Can’t fault you on that observation!
Message:

Depends how much you squirm ;)

We can forget suspension today – just stick to the bed, yeah? Don’t do anything you don’t want. I know you don’t like pain, so I’ll be really gentle x

Jack
x

To: Jack Harkness
From: Ianto Jones
Subject: RE: It’s my quiet observation that alerted me to the fact. No one else will ever guess the truth about you.
Message:

I’m wary of having my wrists tied where I can’t see them – especially after remembering the Beacons. I know I’ve had them cuffed behind my back a few times, but I can concentrate better when I can see them. Keep that in mind, please. Nothing over my mouth either (Note: over my mouth; put whatever you want in it ...), I don’t think. I know we don’t really do gags or anything, but just making sure you know prior to implicating whatever’s going through your filthy little brain at the moment.

I don’t want to be too uncomfortable – I will need to be able to walk tomorrow. The safeword’s still lighthouse, yeah?

Ianto

To: Ianto Jones
From: Jack Harkness
Subject: RE: I’m an omnisexual manwhore. Why not just accept me for who I am?
Message:

I’ll make sure it doesn’t hurt or leave marks, keep your wrists where you can see them and put nothing over your mouth. You’d very much like to do as gravity intended and remain on a solid surface/mattress, and the safeword’s lighthouse.

I’m guessing tying your balls up with a bootlace is out of the question? [joke ;)]

To: Jack Harkness
From: Ianto Jones
Subject: RE: You’re not a manwhore. You’re mine all mine! – or I may have to shoot someone ...
Message:

So far out of the question, even omnioculars won’t be able to see it, my love.

Speaking of wonderful technology: could I borrow whatever it is you zapped your coat with that keeps it constantly perfect? I’d like to use it on my suits.

... if you don’t let me, I swear to God I’ll put all my clothing and dry-cleaning expenses on the Torchwood account.

To: Ianto Jones
From: Jack Harkness
Subject: RE: Shush you! I have a reputation to uphold! :)
Message:

What are omnioculars?

I’m not sure where the thing is. I remember it was blue, and had a button on it. Came through the rift in about 1939 and zapped myself with it by accident. It might be in Harmless Misc, or it could be in Household Appliances and Furnishings. You’ll have to find it yourself, I think. Sorry Chino x

To: Jack Harkness
From: Ianto Jones
Subject: RE: Uphold it near Swanson. Oh no, wait! *facepalm* she’s immune ...
Message:

I’ll start with “blue things with buttons” in the 1939 reports. I’m sure it will be a fruitful search *rolls eyes*

What’s Chino?

To: Ianto Jones
From: Jack Harkness
Subject: RE: That’s because she’s a lesbian dominatrix
Message:

You’re Chino! Cappuccino.

Nickname/pet name/ term of endearment for just us two – remember?

It’s yours, and you’re going to like it.

To: Jack Harkness
From: Ianto Jones
Subject: RE: That information does fantastic things to my mind ...
Message:

*grumbles*

Was I by any chance:

a) drunk

or

b) on top of a half-naked you

when I agreed to that?

And why ‘Cappuccino’? I don’t drink cappuccino!

To: Ianto Jones
From: Jack Harkness
Subject: RE: Can I do some things with your mind for a bit? I know you like chocolate flavoured Jack ...
Message:

Because on the surface you’re all light and frothy, but underneath there’s so much unexpected depth and richness that only I get to see.

I thought about it! See!

... and don’t tell me off for being a soppy bastard. You know you love it really.

To: Jack Harkness
From: Ianto Jones
Subject: RE: I prefer chocolate flavoured milk, but woteva
Message:

Mmmkay. Just don’t expect me to answer to it.

I’ve done a brief search for “blue thing with button” in the 1939 reports, but can’t find anything just yet. Can you think of anything more specific? Who brought it in, where it was found etc.

To: Ianto Jones
From: Jack Harkness
Subject: RE: You want me so badly. You know you do.
Message:

Forget about it. You get back to sorting your little ante-chamber or whatever you call it, and I’ll have a look for it.

xx Jack xx

To: Jack Harkness
From: Ianto Jones
Subject: RE: I want you to give me a moment’s peace ... so, so badly ...
Message:

DON’T YOU DARE GO NEAR MY ARCHIVES!!!

FIN

Couldn't decide on angst, fluff or smut. So went with a smidge of all three. Thank the indecisiveness of naddypants, who both stalled and accelerated this chapter. [;)]

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