Torchwood IMs: Unemployment, and Jack's Suggestions

[a_silver_story]

Title: Unemployment, and Jack's Suggestions
Chapter: 84
Characters: Ianto Jones, Jack Harkness, Mica Davies
Author: a_silver_story
Genre Humour, smut, angst
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: M.M implied
Disclaimer: If I owned anything in this, I'd be a rich rich rich bitch. However, I am not a rich rich rich bitch so you may all, therefore, assume I own nothing. Which I don't. It all belongs RTD and the BBC, in case any of you didn't know.
Summary: See title, really.


FIRST PART | Ianto and Gwen's IM's


PREVIOUS | Torchwood Index/Masterlist





84 |








IM | 84








Ianto was half way between asleep and awake. He just wasn't tired enough to properly drift off, nor awake enough to be up and about. His body refused to move, far too comfortable, sinking blissfully into the mattress. His mind, however, was very much active, running over the events of the previous week, regretting how he'd handled things and dwelling on what he wished he could change.

It had been six days since he'd been fired, and he'd done literally nothing. He stayed at home, watched television, cleaned what was already clean and sat around reading and doing nothing in particular. His body wasn't used to all the sudden leisure time, constantly itching at him to do something, and now that he could sleep basically whenever he wanted he didn't need as much coffee - which in turn lead to caffeine withdrawal and then to headaches and pains.

Jack had agreed to support him, sending him money and helping him to find a new job. Ianto didn't want a new job, though. He wanted to work for Torchwood - with Jack and Gwen; hell, he was even missing Janet and Myfanwy. He wondered briefly if anyone was remembering to feed Myfanwy, or if Jack was bothering to continue his research into Janet's increasingly strange behaviour.

The sound of the front door opening and closing distracted Ianto for a second, but he could tell from the two heavy thuds of CAT boots hitting the floor it was Jack. He felt inwardly relieved - they'd done this for three nights now, and he'd been starting to think Jack wasn't coming. Granted, he'd probably been held up at work, but Ianto had started to worry that maybe Jack was drifting. The first time it happened - two days after leaving Torchwood - Ianto had been properly asleep, waking in the middle of the night to find Jack lying beside him, watching him. They didn't even speak to each other, kissing non-committally and having sex for the sake of it. When Ianto woke the next morning, Jack had left, coming and going without saying a word.

The next night Ianto lay awake, pretending to be oblivious when he heard the front door. Jack lay on the bed next to him, stroking his hair and playing with his ear lobe, making him sleepy and eventually drift off. Again, when he woke, Jack was gone.

The third night, when Jack got in bed, Ianto wrapped himself around him and fell into unconsciousness with Jack's scent drowning his brain. Jack was gone by five AM, and Ianto hugged his knees for two hours before deciding to finally get out of bed.

It was the fourth night now, and Ianto wondered idly if tonight they would break the silence. The mattress dipped as Jack climbed onto the circular bed, his hands running over the covers and finding Ianto's body. He spooned into his back and kissed his nape, and Ianto shivered and forced his eyes open.

"I miss you at work." whispered Jack, kissing his neck.

"Let me come back then." Ianto replied, his voice thick with sleep.

Jack gave a small laugh, but didn't dignify the suggestion with a verbal answer. "Andy starts at Torchwood on Monday. For his trial."

"How wonderful."

"I think once we get over his naivete, he'll be a good field agent."

"He's a Cardiff PO. He's probably got very little naivete left." scowled Ianto, ignoring the strong hand splayed over his chest and searching out his heartbeat. He sighed heavily, asking what he'd been meaning to ask for nearly a week. "Have ... have the time switches or whatever you're calling them happened again?"

"Not since that day, no." Jack replied, stroking Ianto's hair before slipping his arm under his head so that he could use his bicep as a pillow. Ianto fidgeted slightly, settled and got comfortable.

"Why are you here, Jack?" he asked, trying not to sound irritable.

"I want to be near you. I miss you. I love you. And I've brought you a cheque."

"You sound like a dad bringing child support."

Jack gave a small laugh, cuddling him tighter. "I'm always going to take care of you, Ianto."

"Even when I'm old and frail and donning a catheter?"

"I'll be changing the catheter." Jack joked. "Unless you go bald. I'm sorry ... I don't do bald ..."

Ianto sniggered. "Y'know ... baldness is the result of having too much testosterone ..."

"You'd better stop swallowing then."

Ianto laughed properly for the first time in a week, turning in Jack's arms and kissing his lips gently. "I know why you're doing this," he said softly."but that doesn't mean I have to like it."

"I know." Jack agreed solemnly. "I ... I've been looking into finding you a new job. One you'll like."

Ianto inwardly groaned, but figured he could at least throw Jack some form of line. "Yeah?"

"There's a little shop for sale on the bay. I was thinking ... if you got it, you could maybe open a coffee shop or something?"

"... with Starbucks just down the road?" Ianto pointed out.

Jack rolled onto his back. "Yeah ... you're right ... silly idea."

"I didn't say it was silly, Jack. I just ..." Ianto sighed. "... what would we do in my shop that would be different than Starbucks or Cafe Nero? What would be the niche in the market that would make people more likely to come to my place than a chain?"

"You could swear on your own grave that you'd never, ever burn the beans as badly as they constantly do in other places." suggested Jack. They were both silent in thought for a moment, before Jack decided to suggest something else. "What about ice cream? Homemade ice cream and coffee?"

"I don't like ice cream: it gives me a headache."

"I didn't say you'd have to eat it. Maybe you could do soup as well. Soup, sandwiches, ice cream and coffee."

"If I have ice cream, I'll have to do milkshake. Real milkshake, made from the ice cream and milk instead of that stupid instant powdery stuff they pedal these days."

"Italian biscuits. Or gingerbread. You could sell those chocolate things on sticks that you use to stir coffee."

"I could sell chocolates. A chocolate counter, where you pick which ones you want and put in an assortment bag."

"You can't sell chocolate. You'll get fat from sneaking it when no one's looking."

"I'm already getting fat." replied Ianto, poking his belly. Jack mimicked him, poking it himself a few times for good measure.

"Happy weight." Jack declared. "Though, if you want a new exercise regime ..."

"Hmmm." smirked Ianto. "Maybe ... after all, chocolate is an aphrodisiac ..."

"Chocolate, Coffee, Ice Cream and Milkshake Parlour."

"Sounds a bit too much." yawned Ianto.

"Chocolate and Coffee. Aphrodisiac and caffeine. The perfect combination."

"Is this hypothetical shop for my benefit or yours?"

"I believe it would be win:win." smiled Jack.

"Mmmmm."

"So?" asked Jack carefully. "Would you ... like that?"

"It'd never happen, Jack." sighed Ianto resignedly. "First off, I can't afford the shop, let alone get backing for the equipment. I have no idea how to run a business - though I could probably get by on accounting and stock take. I'd have to get all sorts of legal advice, work out suppliers, pricing, potential profit, a target mark-"

"Shut up." interrupted Jack. Ianto blinked. "Why don't you just try it and see? I can get you money for the shop and the equipment. You can pay it back when you can without interest, so no need for banking or backers. I can get you all the legal advice you need - and I'm sure it won't be difficult for you to source materials. As for running a business: hire someone. Do you know anyone who has any qualifications in business studies?"

Ianto groaned audibly, rubbing his eyes.

"What?"

"The only person I know with an A Level in business studies or above is Rhiannon."

"The Jones Sibling's Chocolate and Coffee Bar."

"Piss off. Seriously. Not happening."

"I thought Rhiannon was unemployed for the moment?" smirked Jack. "I'm sure she'd be glad to -"

"She'd want a share in the business." scowled Ianto.

"She's your sister."

"She's the spawn of the Devil."

"Are you honestly trying to suggest that your sibling is worse than mine?" asked Jack, eyebrow raised.

Ianto bit his lip.

"My point exactly. You could bond properly over this. I know things have been fine between you two lately - that makes the timing perfect."

"We could also fall apart." pointed out Ianto.

"Mmm." agreed Jack. Ianto yawned again, and Jack leant over and kissed his cheek. "You're sleepy."

"Yahummm." said Ianto, by way of reply. "Well, my body is. My mind won't switch off. I hate being unemployed."

Jack said nothing, sensing an argument suddenly sizzling into the room. Ianto felt it too, and kept his mouth shut. Instead he let Jack kiss him, before forcing him onto his back and straddling his hips. Jack lay there and let Ianto kiss his way down his abdomen, loosely lacing fingers through his hair and applying a little pressure, trying to direct him lower. Ianto laughed and looked up at him, kissing his palm and sucking the tips of a couple of fingers. He lifted his hips as Ianto tugged his trousers and boxers down, pulling out his erection. A millisecond before his lips touched the sensitive flesh, there was a frantic knock on the door.

"If that's Gwen, I doubt Rhys will ever see her alive again." growled Jack. Ianto sniggered, climbing from the bed to pull his dressing gown on and hide his own erection.

"You wait there, I'll go see who it is." he told Jack sarcastically, acknowledging the fact Jack hadn't even moved to cover himself, simply lying still and playing with himself a little. He playfully gave Ianto the finger, who stuck his tongue out as he backed out of the room. The frantic knocking was echoing through the flat again, and Ianto wrenched the door open in annoyance.

"What? - oh ... Rhiannon? It's eleven 'o' clock ... um. What's wrong?"

He found a bundle of small child shoved into his arms.

"David fell down the stairs and I think he broke something. You have to look after Mica - please! Just until I can get his arm set ... Mica? Stay with your Uncle Ianto. He's going to look after you while I take David to the hospital. Okay?"

"Woah woah woah ..." Ianto called as Rhiannon turned to leave. "I don't know how to look after a kid!"

"Just a couple of hours, Ianto. Stick a DVD on or something."

"Shouldn't she be in bed?" he asked dubiously. The Mica giggled.

"In the child mentality, if the other sibling is awake, she has to be." Jack's voice called from the living room. "If David gets to be awake, so does she. Otherwise it's perceived as punishment."

Mica stared at Jack. "Hellow." she said sheepishly.

"Hello, princess. Wanna find a DVD to watch?"

"Yeah!"

She wriggled out of Ianto's arms - for which he was grateful, as she really was a bit too heavy to carry - and ran over to Jack, tightly clasping his hand and sitting on his lap on the floor as they examined Ianto's DVDs.

Ianto was immensely grateful for his foresight to put the porn elsewhere.

"See!" grinned Rhiannon. "Two of you, one of her. No problem."

"Yeah." Ianto agree sarcastically. "You say that, but I saw 'Two Men and a Baby'. And 'Baby's Day Out'. And ' Kindergarten Cop'."

"There you are then. Jack can be Arnold Schwarzenegger and you can be the dopey teacher he falls in love with. Now if you'll excuse me I have a screaming boy in the car with a broken arm that needs seeing to before someone hears him."

"You left him in the car?"

"Have you any idea how hard it was to get his seatbelt on first time? I think it did more harm than good."

"Whatever. Just ... run on back and get him sorted. If Mica gets tired we can put her down in the spare room."

"Okay." agreed Rhiannon. "Thanks, Ianto. I really appreciate this." With that she whipped away down the staircase, leaving Ianto in the open door. He shut it with a snap and turned to see Mica settled comfortably on Jack's lap as they read the back of a DVD cover together. She was reading out loud and slowly - she was what? Six? Seven? - and Jack had to help her on some of the bigger words. Ianto had a feeling that some of the struggle was for show, keeping Jack's attention on her.

Jack glanced up when he heard the door shut, and flashed Ianto a quick smile before returning to help Mica with the reading.

"Don't like it." declared Mica, throwing aside the last of the five DVDs within her age limitations to watch.

"Brilliant." muttered Ianto, sitting on the couch feeling useless with no idea what to do.

"Can we go to Blockbuster?"

"Blockbuster's is shut." Ianto replied dully.

"Let's play a game?" suggested Jack. "What games you got, Uncle Ianto?" he smirked.

Ianto shot him a quick glare. "I'll have a look Great Uncle Jack." He got up off the sofa and went into the spare bedroom, opening the cupboard where he kept all kinds of tit bits from his childhood. He wasn't sure what games would be there, but was pleasantly surprised to find he'd kept a couple.

"Okay ..." he declared loudly as he re-entered the living room with his stack of boxes. He raised his eyebrow slightly when he saw Jack and Mica on their knees opposite each other, playing a hand-clap game to the rhyme of 'Pepsi Cola'. "Anyway ..." He cleared his throat. "We've got Operation, Ludo, Pictionary and Pokemon Master Trainer."

"What's 'Pokemon'?"

Ianto stared at her. "Ohhh c'mon! You don't know what Pokemon is? It was huge in the nineties!"

"She was born in 2003." Jack reminded him. "... and by then, weren't you a little old for Pokemon?"

"Not as old as you were." grumbled Ianto, and Jack gave him a small laugh for his childishness.

"What do you want to play, Mica?" Jack asked her.

"I don't like any of those games." she huffed. "Haven't you got an Xbox?"

"An Xbox? You're six!" exclaimed Ianto.

"You're OLD!" she pouted.

"Not as old as Jack!" he retorted.

"Calm down, kids!" Jack interrupted. "Okay ... what do you do with your mum or Rhiannon?"

She smiled at Jack. "Sometimes we make biscuits."

"No." Ianto said instantly.

"What kind of biscuits?"

"Jack, it's going to be beyond messy." Ianto warned.

"Gingerbread men, cookies, yum yums ..."

"What're yum yums?"

"It doesn't matter. It's not happening."

"They're like the Scottish biscuits, but smaller and you use a fork to make ridges in the top."

"Will there be a recipe online?"

"Probably!"

"I think the internet broke."

"That's alright. Shortbread's easy. Flour, sugar, butter ..."

"Dammit! D'ya know what?" Ianto said melodramatically. "I have absolutely no flour. At all. Not even a teeny tiny bit. Looks like we can't do anything messy. Especially not baking."

Mica scowled at him. "You're mean."

Ianto blinked, a little taken aback. "I ... I'm not. I'm just ... it's not practical ... it's just gone eleven 'o' clock! You shouldn't even be awake!"

"David's awake." she pointed out.

"David's snapped his arm in two."

"There's a twenty-four hour Tesco less than a ten minute drive away." cut in Jack.

Ianto gave him The Death Glare.

"What?" asked Jack.

"You're spoiling her." he chastised. Mica gave a little giggle and wriggled to put her arms around Jack's waist.

"Apparently I'm 'Uncle Jack'. 'Uncle Jack' spoils his little Princess." He got up off the floor and when he was near enough to his partner, he leant in close and whispered: "And so should Uncle Ianto." He pulled back and smiled down at the little girl clutching his hand. "Wanna ride in Uncle Ianto's car, or Uncle Jack's?"

"Uncle Jack's!"

Ianto sighed. "I'll fetch my coat."




~*~*~*~




"Forty-five bottles of beer on the wall, forty-five bottles of beer! Take one down, pass it around, forty-four bottles of beer on the wall. Forty-four bottles of beer on the wall, forty four bottles of beer! Take one down, pass it around ..."

"I'm walking if she carries on like this." groaned Ianto, massaging his temples. "And you're not helping!"

Jack paused his duet with Mica. "Loosen up - she's six! And it's a rather fun driving song."

"It's only fun if you're singing along." grumbled Ianto.

"Sing along then!" Jack chided, rejoining the song with gusto.

Ianto began repeatedly knocking his head on the dashboard.





~*~*~*~




"I know you prefer the red packaging Mica, but the blue one is the one we need." Ianto repeated. A middle-aged woman gave him an 'awwww - been there' look. Ianto had the overwhelming urge to scream in the woman's face that he most certainly was not the sire of this spoilt little urchin, and anyone who assumed otherwise should be forced to write, a thousand times over, in fountain pen on cartridge paper: "Ianto Jones is in no way responsible for this accident of fluids, chromosomes, evolution, generally bad parenting and a split condom.".

Jack had bound off somewhere else - probably to get a ginormous sack of Pic'n'Mix, and when he'd found them again he'd dump it in the trolley and run away with the intention of getting something for Ianto and Mica, too.

Eventually, Ianto managed to persuade Mica that they had to get the packaging with blue flour, but only if they got something else that was red. He rolled his eyes, hefting the basket to rest in the crook of his elbow. "Do you think Uncle Jack would be able to find us if we went to the toy section?" he asked her.

"He's probably already in the toy section." she deadpanned.

Ianto laughed as they set off walking together, and she skipped happily beside him. She dragged him down an aisle that was very, very pink.

"Can I get this doll?" she asked, holding up a Bratz doll with black skin and jet black hair, wearing ice skates and very little in the way of clothes - nothing more than a little silver skirt and fur-trimmed top and bolero. He raised an eyebrow.

"How many dolls have you got already?"

"I don't have an ice skater." she said, putting on her biggest smile as she squeezed out the word 'pleeeeeeeeese!'.

"If I get you something, I'll have to get David something." Ianto reasoned, remembering Jack's advice to spoil her. He wouldn't go out and fully Harkness© spoil her, but he could find something half way, he supposed. "What would David want?"

Mica shoved a similar box with a similar doll in it under his nose. This one was white and blonde. "I think he'd want this one."

Ianto's eyebrow raised again. "Are you sure? Or is that just what you want?"

"Nope. He'd definitely want her."

"Right. Well, before we decide what to get him, shall we have a look at the boys toys and see if there's anything else we might think is better?"

He didn't wait for a reply before moving onto the next aisle, and finding lots of cars, planes, action figures and lego. He also found a Jack.

"Mica!" Ianto called. "You were right! Uncle Jack's already at the toys!"

She scurried around the corner, cannon-balling straight into Jack and nearly dropping her doll.

"What's that?" Jack asked, crouching down so that he was eye-level with her and taking the doll. He gave her an almost incredulous look. "Did ... did you pick her?" he asked.

"Yep. I've wanted her for ages." she beamed, trying to sit on Jack's knee where he was crouched. "I have all the others." she continued. "I don't have this one though."

"I thought you said you didn't have an ice skater?" Ianto pointed out.

"I have the other dolls in other sets." she explained as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.

"Anyway ... what does David like? Planes, trains, cars, Lego ... how old is he, anyway?"

"Ten." replied Mica as Jack hoisted her up to sit on his hip to look at the die-cast planes.

"Does he like Star Wars?"

"Star Wars is for old people."

Ianto managed to somehow not drop the basket.

"Lord of the Rings?"

"Old People."

"Star Trek?"

"He's not old enough to see it."

Ianto blinked, then realised she meant the film that had just been released. "I meant the TV series ... oh my God ... Jack, I'm going to have to educate that boy. Starting with the Star Wars trilogy and the digitally remastered version of The Wrath of Khan ..."

"Calm down ..." Jack said, getting near him and talking soothingly. "... I'm sure he'll learn about the wonders of Science Fiction and Fantasy in good time ... he's only ten!"

"He should be wandering around the playground making lightsabre noises."

"You are old!" giggled Mica. Ianto stuck his tongue out at her and she mimicked the gesture.

Ianto laughed, then focussed on who was stood behind Jack. "Ohhh ... buggeration ..." he hissed to himself.

"What's up?" asked Jack.

"Those people behind you." he whispered. "I went to college with the girl ... it ... well, it ended a badly ..."

"Ianto? Ianto Jones?"

"Ahhh ... shit."

"You're not allowed to say that." scowled Mica.

"Heyyy ... Bethan ..." Ianto forced himself to smile. "How are ya?" He took her hand and kissed her cheek politely, and he was vaguely aware of Jack putting Mica down beside him. He shook the hand of the man with her.

"Shouldn't the little tyke be in bed?" she asked, smiling at Mica and giving her a hair a little ruffle.

"David's still up." she replied, by way of explanation.

"David?"

"Her big brother." Ianto told her.

"Ohh! You have two!" she beamed.

"Wha -?"

"Aww that's wonderful!" she hugged him, though he was still at a loss for words. "What's your name, sweetheart?" she asked Mica, bending down to talk to her.

"Mica. I'm getting a doll."

"Oh. Isn't she beautiful?" Bethan stood up straight to talk to Ianto again. "So ... who's her mam?"

"My sister's ex-husband's fling." Ianto said flatly.

"Ohhhhhhhh! So you're her Uncle. Sorry." she hastily replied. "I hope you're spoiling her rotten!"

"Jack's forcing me to let her bake."

"Cap'n Jack Harkness." Jack introduced himself, seeing his cue and turning on his big grin. Bethan instantly fell for it, as did Mica. Ianto had found that in time, over-exposure had made him semi-immune. But only semi. Yeah ... definitely only semi ... *ahem*

"Oh ... hello. I'm Bethan. Ianto and I went to college together."

"I heard - the second before you recognised him."

They laughed, and Ianto shuffled uncomfortably. Coming out to his family was fine ... but if Bethan knew, she'd spread it around everyone he'd ever known before he had a chance to tell them himself. Ah well, he supposed it didn't matter that much anyway.

"So ... Captain?" Bethan asked, and the fella she was actually supposed to be with rolled his eyes. Ianto began to notice a couple of parallels.

"Ex-RAF." grinned Jack, motioning the coat. "Left the force years ago. Government now, unfortunately."

"Anway, it's getting late." interrupted Bethan's man just as Ianto opened his mouth to do the same. "Your little girl is starting to look a little bit sleepy."

Mica was hopping on the spot quite actively, counting her hops and going round in circles.

"That she is." Jack replied coolly. "Anyway, you two are welcome to come and have dinner at mine and Ianto's place any time. Just let us know if you wanna come." He put his arm very pointedly on Ianto's shoulder and gave it a little squeeze.

The cogs worked behind Bethan's eyes, and she took the hint, her mouth forming an 'o' of comprehension. "We'll ... definitely have to do that, won't we? Gavin?"

"Yeah." agreed 'Gavin', clearly much happier after discovering Jack was (a) taken and (b) apparently gay. "Next week, maybe."

Jack glanced at Ianto. "Er ... yeah. Next week. Thursday?"

"No can do, m'fraid. Wednesday, perhaps?" offered Bethan.

"Wednesday should be fine." smiled Jack.

"I'm going to watch the rugby with the boys on Wednesday ..." Ianto growled under his breath. He was fairly sure Gavin was whispering the same in undertones to Bethan. Both Jack and Bethan gave their respective partners a quick elbow in the ribs.

"Bored." Mica announced. "Can we go home yetttt?"

"In a minute, Princess. Uncle Jack and Uncle Ianto are busy. Why don't you count how many steps it is from one end of the aisle to the other?"

"Can I do it walking backwards?"

"Sure? Why not?"

"Mica!" panicked Ianto. "Forwards - you can only go forwards! Jack!"

Jack chuckled. "Only go forwards, Mica." he said lazily, and she instantly did as she was told.

Ianto scowled.

"Anyway ... we were moving on ..." Bethan reminded them. They said their goodbyes, swapped numbers and returned to their search of a gift for David.

"Let's get him a plane." Jack said, examining a British war plane that Ianto was fairly certain carried no historical accuracies. Ianto decided that if Mica was any measure to go by, if Jack gave it him, he'd love it. He felt a little jealous knowing that.

"Get him a plane." sighed Ianto. "Mica - put your dolly in the basket, please. You don't want to ruin her before we've got her out the shop, do you?"

"We need to get something red." she reminded him as she did as she was told. "And it's twenty-two Mica-steps from one end to the other." she informed Jack.

"Twenty-two? It's twelve Jack-steps."

"... I'm not even going to ask how you know that ..." Ianto said.

"AWwww c'mon! Everyone counts how many steps it is from one end of the aisle to the other!"

"I didn't." Ianto replied, shifting uncomfortably. "Now ... we need to find something red ...."

"What about that?" Jack pointed at a red dolly-style swing coat on a clothing rack.

Mica looked where he was pointing and ran over to it, pulling it off the hanger.

"Hang on ... hang on ... how much is it?" Ianto tried to find the tag. "Fifteen pounds .... is it your size? Let's check ... do you really need a coat, Mica?"

"Everyone needs a cool coat." Jack shrugged, helping button up Mica's front. For effect, he gave his own a swish as he stood.

"Yes but ... shouldn't her mother buy her coats and things?"

"She didn't come with one." frowned Jack. "And look at the little Princess - she's adorable in it. We could say we bought it for her because she was so upset about her brother -"

"Upset." agreed Mica.

"- and when she saw it her face lit up, and it made her feel better."

"Much better." nodded Mica. "Look at me. I'm glowing." She gave him a massive grin.

"I'm never going to win against you two, am I?" sighed Ianto. "Look ... that one's too small, Mica. Let's see if there's one for big girls."

He searched through the rack while Jack helped her off with the other coat.

"Here we are ..."

She put it on, and it fit much better than the other one.

"Fine ..." sighed Ianto. "That one then. And nothing else. Understand?"

"Thank you, Uncle Ianto!" cried Mica, and threw her arms around his waist. He awkwardly patted her shoulder, not sure what to do with the contact. She broke away from him finally, and Jack grinned. Mica was pulling at the buttons on the coat, and Ianto helped her take it off. Jack gave him an odd look, this thus far being his job, but then stepped aside to hold out the hanger for Ianto to put the coat back on it.

They paid at the self service, at Jack's insistence and delight. Ianto spent most of the time arguing with the infuriatingly calm automated voice.

"Please place the item you have just scanned into the bagging area."

Ianto dropped the doll heavily into the bag for a third time.

"Please place the item you have just scanned into the bagging area."

He picked it up and dropped it again.

"Please place the item you have just scanned into the bagging area."

"I'm going to kill this woman." he snapped at Jack, who sniggered.

"Please place the item you have just scanned into the bagging area."

"Seriously."

"Please wait for assistance."

"Oh for fff-"

"Little ears." Jack reminded him, and Ianto scowled.

"This hasn't been a good night." he groaned. "And I'm shattered."

"We're on our way back." Jack assured him. "And I'll drive back as well, if you want."

Ianto massaged his temples and gave Jack a small smile of gratitude as a half-asleep shop assistant came to help them with their un-bagged doll.




~*~*~*~




"Hello? Rhiannon?" Ianto answered his phone as he put the shopping bags on the counter.

"Ianto! How's it going?"

"... fine ..." grumbled Ianto. "I've been persuaded into making yum yums at this ungodly hour."

"Oh ... well ... when you've done that ... David's chipped his collar bone so they want to keep him in overnight. Could she stay with you until morning? You know I wouldn't ask unless I was desperate ..."

"Yeah ... yeah ... it's fine ..." Ianto found himself rubbing his forehead. He glanced over at Jack and Mica, who were taking the all the tags and plasticky things off the doll they'd just bought. "She can sleep in a t-shirt or something and I'll shove her stuff in the washing machine."

"Thanks, Ianto."

"No problem. Well ... not too much of a problem anyway."

"I've got to go. I promised David I'd only be a couple of minutes."

"Yeah. See ya and ... send him my love?" he tried, a little awkward with what he should say. Eventually they rang off, and Ianto started getting scales ready and some bowls. He set the oven and started measuring things out. "Jack?" he called.

"Yahuh?" Jack replied, sticking his tongue out as he cut into a plastic cable tie that held the doll in her cardboard confines.

"Could you pop Mica into a t-shirt or something, please? One we won't mind getting messy."

"One of mine, I think you mean." smiled Jack.

"Definitely." laughed Ianto. "I think you've got some older ones in the spare room. Holey ones. Stick a couple of those on her and she won't know the difference."

Jack lead Mica to the spare room and found his worn t-shirts in a drawer. He turned around, holding out a couple of blue ones, to see Mica holding a photograph she'd found on the floor.

"Who's this?" she asked, showing it to him.

"Oh ... that's ... well, before your Uncle Ianto met me, he was with another lady. She was called Lisa. Where did you find this picture, Princess?"

She pointed at the floor in front of the cupboard. Jack realised it must have fallen out when Ianto had gone to fetch the board games and he'd been too annoyed to notice. Taking the photo from her, he went over to the cupboard and slipped it in with the rest of the pictures of Lisa Ianto had kept.

"Don't tell Uncle Ianto you found that photo, okay Princess? He might get upset. He's still sad about her."

"What happened?"

"She got very sick, and she died." Jack told her sadly.

"Oh." She glanced at her doll. "Can I give him my dolly and call her 'Lisa'?"

"No, Princess. I don't think a dolly will help." Jack kissed her temple. "But it was very kind of you to offer. Don't forget though: Uncle Ianto bought that as a present for you, and you have to look after her, okay?"

"Okay ... so can we make biscuits now?"

"Get these t-shirts on first."

With a bit of a struggle, Jack managed to get Mica undressed and dressed again without her letting go of her doll. He tossed all her clothes into a pile in the corner.

"Don't they need to go in the basket?" she asked.

"Ianto will get them." Jack replied, then wondered if there actually was a basket. When he was at Ianto's, he generally just left his clothes where he took them off. He'd never really thought about it before. Ianto just took care of it all, as usual. "C'mon. Biscuits."

They walked into the living room to find Ianto lying on the settee, huddled and sleeping. Mica held a finger to her lips as she took Jack into the kitchen, and he began to quietly help her mix together the ingredients to the best of his memory. When they were in the oven, they sat in front of the door to watch the little biscuits turn golden.

"Jack? Mica?" Ianto's voice called groggily from the living room.

"Kitchen." Jack called back. He yawned widely. It was past one AM. "One biscuit, brush your teeth then bed, methinks little lady." he sighed.

"Yeah." agreed Mica, too tired to argue.

"You figured she's staying the night, then." Ianto observed as he sat beside Jack in front of the oven.

Jack nodded and yawned again. Mica followed suit, and Ianto caught the contagion. They laughed at each other.

Mica started putting her doll in ice skating poses while Ianto put his head on Jack's shoulder to watch her. And arm slipped around his waist and they smiled contentedly at each other.

"Are you married?" Mica asked quite bluntly.

Jack and Ianto blinked and spluttered.

"I .. ah ... well ... no." blushed Ianto, unsure why he was flushing.

"Oh. My friend Sian's got two mams. They're married."

"That's ... nice ..." winced Jack.

"I go over there for tea sometimes. They've got a massive tree. When Sian's brother gets back from the army he's going to build us a tree house like Rhacsyn."

"... won't that involve hollowing out a tree?"

"It'll just look like it on the inside." Mica rolled her eyes. "Hollowing out the tree would be stupid."

Ianto raised an eyebrow.

"Who's Rhacsyn?" frowned Jack.

Ianto gave him a sidelong smile. "Welsh TV character*. Middle-aged man in a shiny suit who spends half his time talking to animals."**

"He's magic." Mica added authoritatively. "He lives in a tree. And they sing songs."

"Oh ... right ..." replied Jack. "... um ... any ... favourites?"

"The Nos Da Song! He sings it with Gwenllian. The wise owl."

Jack and Ianto smirked at each other.

"Sure ..." Jack said. "Wise. Definitely." ***

"Oo! I think the biscuits are done!" Ianto pointed at the now golden-brown disks baking in the oven. They all got up from the floor, and Ianto carefully removed them (being the only 'responsible grown up' - Mica's words, not his own, though he had definitely thought them), sliding them onto a wire cooling rack. He slapped Mica's hand away gently.

"Not until they've cooled a bit, or they'll break apart."

"'Kay." she agreed glumly, eyeing the biscuits greedily. Her expression was mirrored in Jack's face, and Ianto gave him a warning glance.

They played 'Who Can Be Quietest The Longest?' until the biscuits cooled a little - a game that Jack, quite frankly, was abysmal at.

Mica had had her quota of one biscuit, and Ianto had just managed to shove a spare toothbrush in her mouth when Jack's phone rang.

"Gwen? Yeah ... yeah ... right ... okay, I'll be right there ..." He snapped his phone shut and gave Ianto an apologetic look. "I gotta go. Er ... sighting."

"Yeah." Ianto nodded. Ouch. So this is what it feels like to Rhys? ... ish. "Go on then." he said, forcing himself to smile.

"You be good for Uncle Ianto, Princess." Jack stopped to peck her cheek and give her a quick hug, avoiding getting toothpaste on his coat. "And you be good for Mica." Jack mock-chastised, and pressed a quick kiss to Ianto's lips. He hugged him too, grinned and swept out.

"Where's he going?" Mica asked sadly.

"To work, love."

"Wyw duz ee av toow wuwrk?" she tried, talking while Ianto was scrubbing at her teeth.

"Because he's very, very important. He catches nasty people and stops them committing crimes or hurting others."

"Like a policeman?"

"Yeah ... just ... more dangerous."

"Does he get a gun?"

Ianto regarded her for a moment. She was six - what interest would a six year old have in whether or not someone had a gun? He decided to blame video games and films. Everyone had guns in those, and they made guns look cool.

Ianto hated guns. He preferred his stunner (and by 'stunner' he meant his stun gun, not Jack).

Jack was a different story. His Webley was his toy, almost. He played with it as often as he could.

He snapped out of his reverie when Mica nearly fell into backwards into the bath.

"Right! Bed!" he ordered, lifting her bodily. He gently tucked her in. "Do you need a nightlight?" he asked, and she shook her head.

"Shut the door all the way. And could you turn off the outside light, too, please?"

"Sure." smiled Ianto. "And if you get straight off to sleep, I might consider letting you have a biscuit with yur breakfast."

She instantly wriggled further into the duvet, squeezing her eyes shut as Ianto laughed. He kissed her hair, and hesitated in confusion when the doll was offered to him as well.

"Erm ... does she want a kiss goodnight, too?" he asked awkwardly.

"Her name's Katie. And yes."

"Oh ... okay." He kissed the doll's hair quickly. "Erm ... maybe we should take her skates off while she's sleeping, okay - OH MY GOD! SHE HAS NO FEET!" Ianto exclaimed, pulling at a skate and seeing the whole thing come away and leave a peg on the end of a stumped leg.

Mica held her stomach as she laughed at him.

"Shush you!" he pouted, tucking her in again and pulling off the other foot. "That's ... weird ..."

"Easier though." yawned Mica.

"I suppose." he shrugged. "Night, Mica."

"Night, Uncle Ianto."

He left the room, flicking off the light and shutting the door firmly behind him. He got himself ready for bed again, his joints creaking with tiredness and yawning loudly. He sent a goodnight text to Jack, and got the simple reply: "Shitload of Weevils. Night. x"

Ianto smiled into the dark, and finally drifted off easily. He would think more about Jack's suggestions for future employment when he was more awake - as well as figuring out how to worm himself back into Torchwood. Torchwood had been his primary goal, but Jack had made the little cafe sound like such a plausible idea ... Ianto laughed to himself as he finally fell unconscious - he was actually thinking of a secret government organisation set up to combat alien threats on earth as a more likey job field than owning a little coffee shop.

It was sometimes strange, being Ianto Jones.














_{*This is a real show.
**And no, it's not got John Barrowman in it.
*** Still a real show. Don't believe me? Cymraeg | English}








FIN



















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